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Open Letter to & Sluts and Scholars

For those that don't know, this is totally directed at a porn site. Why would a feminist write about porn? Because we're allowed to be sexual creatures and deserve proper education on the matter. It's not all about the penis.


"Just Relax" isn't relaxing

The phrase can be used in proper contexts, like with a masseuse or physical therapist. In bed with an obviously uncomfortable person is not the place. It's not sexy or calming and shouldn't be portrayed in movies as such.


Try before you bi?

The exact label of what I am or could have been has never hung me up, because it doesn't matter. So why do people focus so much on how other people label themselves?


Finishing a First

Being my first gay romance short story, I find myself caring about Barry and Mark more than normal. I don't write about love or 'making love' that much because I find the virgin/straight love story old and overused. But this is different. The stereotypes and gender norms are different. So I don't feel like I'm writing that typical love story that's been done to death. And I actually want them to really end up together and have that real love story.   I've thought of so many variations of how they wind up together, including the one I started. 

However, I am having a hard time finishing it. It's like I have to make this first one absolutely perfect, as if it would be the only one. I think it's partly because I've thought about them so much. I haven't thought of different couples ending up together, I've always pictured just Mark and Barry in different situations. So picking just one is hard. And I want it to be the right one. I want their ending to be great, for them.     

 I also wonder if I'm struggling to finish because it's my first gay romance and writing about what happens to a man's penis from his point of view is difficult for me. I wrote my first lesbian scene not too long ago and found it easier than I thought I would, even though I've never had sex with another woman. But I know what it feels like from a woman's point of view. I don't know what it's like to have a penis. So with two penises, I don't have a point of view to choose that I've been in before. And maybe I'm putting off finishing their story because I am basically guessing and don't want to be wrong, or look foolish.

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